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… I was trying to fall asleep in a hospital bed on the labor and delivery floor while being monitored for contractions and my babies’ heart rates. An IV line administered medication seeking to slow and stabilize contractions as well as antibiotics in case the babies had to be delivered. Various monitors beeped and nurses came in and out while I *tried* to drift off. Seth and I had planned to spend that night in our newly purchased home – our first home to own – but instead our house sat vacant except for unpacked boxes and furniture. I had not left the hospital bed since being admitted that morning after a normal OB appointment revealed indications of possible preterm labor.
I remember feeling both great anxiety and inexplicable peace. Anxiety that our daughters would be born at only 25 weeks along (and, no, I was not ready for that in any aspect of it) and anxiety at how my life had been altered in the course of a day (no traveling to my brother’s wedding, no more working through August as I’d hoped, no helping with unpacking and settling into our new home). But mixed with this, and in fact overriding it, was a sense of peace as I knew my Shepherd was with me there. He was caring for me and He was caring for our yet unborn daughters. And so eventually (in between nurse checks), I was able to drift off to sleep. If only for a few hours.
To think back on that day a year ago brings a wave of gratitude for God’s faithfulness to us, not only for the healthy daughters who now are exploring every inch of our house as they crawl and who miraculously waited 10 more weeks before birth, but also for so many of you who cared so well for us in this past year. Which prompted the letter of gratitude below – please receive it as a small token of our appreciation:
Dear friends and family,
A year ago today was quite a momentous day for us – the day we moved into our first home and the day I began what would be 10 weeks of bed rest before the birth of Lucia and Alethia on September 8th, 2010. So much happened in such a short period of time: Seth had to find others to supervise our move in his place so that he could join me at the hospital while the doctors tried to discern how imminent my pre-term labor would be and how to stop or slow it down. I felt perfectly fine although my body was trying to go into labor to deliver our 25-week-old twin daughters. We were terrified many moments throughout that day as we awaited more information. A few days later, we were relieved that I could be discharged from the hospital but unsure how long before I would deliver and how we would make it day-to-day as I endured strict bathroom-privileges-only bed rest.
You stepped into our lives at this point and helped us. You were the hands and feet of Jesus to us as you unpacked boxes, painted walls, completed tiling projects, did laundry, cleaned our house, brought us meals, visited me on the “long days of the recliner,” went grocery shopping and ran errands for us, including picking up our baby furniture for us. Not to mention your constant support through your prayers and words of encouragement to us. And you didn’t stop after the babies were born, but continued to bring meals and provide help as needed. As we tried to remember all of you who had provided assistance for us, there were well over 100 people (and I’m sure we’re missing a few).
“Thank you” feels so flat, but we wanted to again tell you how much we appreciate your ministry to us during this difficulty. Our healthy daughters are themselves a testimony of your help to us and your many, many prayers on our behalf. So – thank you again, and know that you will always have a special place in our hearts for the way you met us at our time of need.
In humble gratitude,
Heather & Seth
For some reason, I thought that I would be delivering this weekend. And unless something crazy happens between now and midnight (less than 4 hours), I don’t think these will be Labor Day deliveries. I’m both relieved and also growing more eager to meet these two. So thankful we are now at 35 weeks! I found this poem that I wrote during my 29th week – to which this post itself is an answer to the prayer voiced at the end. And strange how I feel much the same as I did when I wrote this (except that I am now off bed rest, at least in theory – the reality is that my energy level and physical discomfort still keeps me from most “regular” activitiy).
Longing …
To be out of bed rest
Active again
Just one body, rather than three-in-one.
Muscles relaxing instead of stretching
Seeing face to face
Not just flutters, kicks, and bladder punches to communicate
Who will you look like?
Blue eyes, I bet, but what else?
Blonde hair, like Daddy as a kid –
Or brown hair, like me?
Big eyes taking in the world from moment one as I did?
Or scrunched in confusion and shock as you exit your cozy womb.
(I am not so cozy though)
Yes, there will be crying and feeding …
But also smiling and cooing.
Lord, how long?
I pray it’s longer still yet I also ask you to give endurance.
I feel like mine’s worn out.
As promised awhile ago, here is my review of parenting and pregnancy books I’ve read so far:
PREGNANCY BOOKS
“Pregnancy: The Ultimate Week-by-Week Pregnancy Guide” by Dr. Laura Riley – As she takes you into your pregnancy week-by-week, she has a clear format with interesting and applicable facts for each week. I actually haven’t read any other pregnancy book in detail besides this one. I’ve enjoyed being able to read each week’s information about baby’s growth, my body’s changes, emotional changes, with questions & answers. She includes helpful info for husbands throughout the book as well.
I did browse a friend’s copy of “The Girlfriend’s Guide to Pregnancy” which looked pretty hilarious – a nice balance to the intensity of some of the “what to expect” books on the market.
INFANT SLEEP/FEEDING BOOKS
With twins, we know that we’ll be diving into the deep end of trying to figure out how to care for TWO infants from day one and so I spent most of my self-educational reading in this category.
“Dr. Turtle’s Babies” by Dr. William John Turtle is an “oldie, but goodie.” My grandmother gave this book to my mom to read when she was pregnant with me – and then she gave it to my brother & sister-in-law, who then passed it along to us. One day when I was reading it while waiting for my OB, she told me that she also read it when she was pregnant. If you can get past the fact that he calls mothers “girls” and refers to the baby as “it,” there is some good basic info about infant care, sleeping, and feeding that still holds true. With a few caveats – review it with your doctor! My doctor said, for instance, to disregard what he said about feeding babies sugar water in between feedings.
“On Becoming Baby-Wise: Giving your Infant the Gift of Night-time Sleep” by Ezzo/Buckman is one that I was admittedly wary of beginning because I had heard it was rather harsh. I was pleasantly surprised. I especially liked that he began by saying that what’s crucial to your baby’s well-being is your healthy marriage – that even babies can pick up on the affection and love between their parents and this is what makes them feel secure. He goes on from there to talk about how to put your baby on a schedule that works for your family. With twins, we really have no other option than to schedule them – and that suits our “type-A” personalities anyway!
“Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child” by Dr. Marc Weissbluth also talks about the importance of sleep and setting a routine for your baby. I found it helpful the way he discussed how to look for signs of sleepiness and seek to put your child to sleep before she becomes overly tired. Another motto that sums up his philosophy is “sleep begets more sleep” as he discussed the importance of day-time napping for a baby to be able to go to sleep at night. It generally makes sense, and I especially love that he has an edition specifically for twins that came out last year – this was perfect for us.
TWIN BOOKS
Ok – if you’re like me, you probably had no idea that there were so many books on twins out there. All of these were extremely helpful, and I’ll try to categorize these as “best for …” in order to differentiate between them.
Best for twin pregnancy, labor & delivery (includes sections on bed rest, a recipe collection at the back of the book, specific weight gain goals, what to expect if your babies spend time in the NICU): “When You’re Expecting Twins, Triplets, or Quads” by Dr. Barbara Luke and Tamara Eberlein
Best for practical tips and advice for pregnancy through year one of twins by a mother of twins with lots of humor thrown in to make you laugh as you think about how in the world you’ll make it through … ! “Twinspiration: Real Life Advice from Pregnancy Through the First Year” by Cheryl Lage
Best for practical tips and advice from newborn to toddler phase of twins by a mother of twins who is also quite humorous. My mother-in-law read this book and she said she found it very helpful – that it covers everything and gives specific ideas. “Juggling Twins” by Meghan Regan-Loomis
Best balance of medical advice and practical wisdom for the first 5 years of twins by a mother who’s also a pediatrician. She is straight-forward with helpful advice and not a lot of “fluff,” but her style is readable and practical – like she goes into specifics about how to actually transport twins from your house to the car when they’re still infants. “Raising Twins: From Pregnancy to Preschool” by Dr. Shelly Vaziri Flais
Best for very specific sleeping schedule and feeding advice for the first year of twins with some British English “translation” required – such as deciphering that “dummy” refers to pacifier/etc. It’s a combination book, written primarily by a British nanny who’s an expert on child-rearing with introductions to each chapter by a twin mom: “A Contented House With Twins” by Gina Ford and Alice Beer
Not worth buying or reading: There’s just one in this category that I just didn’t find very helpful – “Twins! Pregnancy, Birth, and the First Year of Life” by Agnew, Klein, and Ganon
PARENTING BOOKS
“A Mother’s Heart: A Look at Values, Vision, and Character for the Christian Mother” by Jean Fleming reminded me of the beautiful and high calling that it is to be a mom. I loved her mix of practical and pastoral teaching on being a mother. She is balanced, biblical, and grace-infused in her approach. I found it very easy to read, and I think it will be a book to return to in years to come. She gives specific ideas and focuses of how to pray for your children, including praying for creativity in connecting with them.
“Parenting by the Book: Biblical Wisdom for Raising Your Child” by John Rosemond offers some practical wisdom and exposes our culture’s current tendency toward “child-centered” parenting and homes. He gives a good initial corrective to this, but I did not find that he talked enough (or at all) about grace and reaching a child’s heart instead of merely producing good behavior. I did like the section where he discusses seasons of parenting, and this is a good starting point, but for a book claiming to be founded on Biblical wisdom, I didn’t find his approach very Christ-centered.
“Don’t Make Me Count to Three: A Mom’s Look at Heart-Oriented Discipline” by Ginger Plowman is a book I read during a “Counseling Children” course at Westminster/CCEF. I am sure that I will return to this book as my girls approach their toddler years for her gospel-centered approach in how to highlight the heart of the matter in your child’s misbehavior. She takes the approach and philosophy of Tedd Tripp’s book, “Shepherding a Child’s Heart” and makes it very practical.
“How Children Raise Parents: The Art of Listening to Your Family” by Dan Allender is the one I am currently reading. I have enjoyed it immensely, as he turns the focus to what purpose children serve in a parent’s life — that having children is part of God’s journey and story for me as a parent and it will be a large way that God sanctifies me in the midst of the parenting process. His central idea is that we as parents are to reflect God’s mercy and strength to our children by answering the two questions they are asking: “Am I loved?” [YES!!!!] and “Can I get my own way?” [No] Here’s a quote as he talks about our dreams for our children – and a fitting end to this blog post:
It is our privilege to dream far bigger dreams than that good things happen and bad things don’t happen to our children. We are to dream and pray and desire and speak to the possibilities that pain and tragedy and pleasure and glory will weave our children into beings who hunger to touch the face of God. … To dream for our children is to lean into the quiet cries of the Holy Spirit that call out the true, God-given name of our child.
There are many reasons why I can hardly believe that it’s September. Like so many of you, I’m asking, “Where did the summer go?” Yet unlike many of you, my answer is rather mundane: umm … it passed while I sat in a recliner observing the comings and goings of our Norfolk neighborhood, wondering how close I was to delivering these twins. There is some grief – that I couldn’t make it to Bryan & Megan’s wedding, that Seth & I only spent a couple days at the beach together (in contrast to last summer when we took full advantage of being only 30 minutes from the beach by going every Saturday), that my favorite of seasons is almost gone, that hanging out with friends and family was always in the same atmosphere: our house. Of course, I would say that it was all worth it – and certainly will be once we meet these daughters of ours.
I am certainly in a very different season of expectancy now. All of my self-given “projects” are over; leaving me to read and write and chat with friends. I feel like “circling the wagons,” in the sense of wanting to soak up each minute of time left when family time still consists of just Seth and me. We are as prepared as we can be, knowing full well that there is nothing that will quite prepare us for the chaotic joy that is ahead of us. I am not sleeping well at night because I can’t get comfortable, and then once I do, I inevitably wake 1-2 hours later and then can’t get back to sleep. I’m not too tired during the day, surprisingly, but I wish I could store up more sleep for the sleepless days & nights sure to come.
And there’s a hurricane coming through this weekend. Three people have told me that the low barometric pressure brought on by such a storm makes labor much more likely. There is some interesting research that seems to support this. And so now that I am at 34 weeks and now that we are in September and now that I feel like there’s really nothing left I need to do … I can’t help but wonder if this weekend (Labor Day weekend, incidentally) will be “the” weekend. Part of me is scared and part of me is excited. It’s similar to the way I’ve felt before each mission trip I’ve embarked upon (to Haiti, Mexico, Ireland, New Orleans): once preparations are completed and it’s the night before leaving, I have a sense of exhilaration mixed with fear. Like I am diving off of a cliff and can’t quite see what’s below. Yet each time, my faith in the God who flies with me – who not only beckons me beyond the comfortable but also goes with me into the unknown – has been strengthened tremendously. I see new sides to God that I never would have noticed had I stayed in the comfortable. Certainly becoming parents to twins will be even more faith-building as we must trust God in ways we cannot even anticipate. Here’s to the journey ahead … which will take me far beyond what has been a comfortable (albeit boring and mundane at times) summer.
I think that the reason that “nesting” is so much fun when you’re pregnant (whether you’re doing the nesting yourself or just asking others to do the work for you … !) is that the nursery is the most tangible symbol of the baby (or babies) that are on their way. [Besides the pregnant belly, of course, but you can't really spend time decorating and organizing it ...] Once these babies arrive, their nursery will fade into the background because THEY will be here – the ones we’ve been preparing it for. An analogy comes to mind – God our Father’s promise that HE is “preparing a place” for us, His children, in His heavenly kingdom. Our arrival there is more certain than our daughters’ arrival to the nursery we’re decorating. This certainty comes not because I’m good enough or ever will be, but precisely because I’m not good enough and I rest entirely on the goodness of our Savior, Jesus Christ. He is certain, and I can trust Him to bring me safely Home one day.
In the meantime, as I await for God to bring forth these babies on their birth day known only to Him … I’m having fun with watching the nursery come together. Here’s a few pictures:
Mom's gorgeous curtains she made for the nursery!
A close-up of the curtains
the crib (Babi Italia from Babies R Us) & bedding set (rhbabyandchild.com)
Dad & Seth - proud painters of the nursery
These last two pictures are of a diaper clutch a friend made for me and brought over as a gift today – isn’t it adorable?! Check out the rest of her high-quality and high-fashion bags/etc. at Barefoot Bags. 
You might be getting tired of posts on the topic of waiting and expectancy, and at moments I find myself getting tired of waiting and being pregnant, too. Yet this is my season of life right now. And I want to embrace it for all that it is, knowing that as the Ecclesiastical wisdom goes, a time for waiting and resting will inevitably transition to a time for birth and parenting that we’ve been waiting for – which will be a season of busyness and activity. Knowing that the end [of pregnancy] is near loads each new day with meaning and anticipation. Knowing that the end date is unknown gives a sense of urgency and purpose to each moment (or at least a heightened desire to be purposeful). I often find myself asking the question, “If I go into labor tonight, what will be most important for me to accomplish today?” At the beginning of bed rest, that question was answered rather simply: finish well with those I had been counseling by referring them to other counselors and complete the grading for the distance ed course I had been proctoring (great course, by the way: CCEF’s “Counseling and Physiology” taught by Dr. Mike Emlet). Gradually my priorities shifted to finding a childbirth preparation DVD since Seth & I couldn’t take the class we were hoping for, packing a hospital bag (umm … yes, this probably should have been my first priority but I think it was part of living in denial the first few weeks), and making sure the preemie-size clothes were washed and ready.
The point of this post isn’t to give a checklist for “preparing for labor and delivery,” as there are MANY out there which are helpful, but rather to draw the analogy to how I want to be living in this same sense of expectancy every day of my life as a Christian. By definition, being a Christian means that I am one who is a member of God’s family because of the grace of Jesus Christ for me and therefore I belong not to my own kingdom and this physical home, but to God’s Kingdom where I will be at Home only when I am face-to-face with Christ (and “away” from this earthly body – after death or Christ’s return). Two sermons I’ve heard during this season of bed rest have caused me to meditate further on this reality – and to long to live all of my life in expectancy.
The first one was preached by my husband on faithful endurance on July 18th, and a key phrase of the Hebrews passage he preached on stood out to me in particular:
“…you knew that you yourselves had a better possession and an abiding one.” (Hebrews 10:34)
He preached on the fact that so many times we are so focused on building on our earthly possessions that we forget about this better possession (all the riches of heaven and knowing Christ) that is to come. And we fail to endure faithfully when we suffer on earth because we think that this is all there is – that THIS is life. This is life, to be sure, but it is only a shadow of the Life to come. And that should make me not less engaged in each day, but more engaged. More purposeful, more desirous to live according to priorities that reflect the Life that is to come. Just as our priorities are being rearranged by the two lives that will soon be coming …
The second sermon that also struck me was by our pastor, Rev. Jack Howell, the following Sunday (July 25th) on Hebrews 11. Here are a few verses that stood out:
“These all [Abel, Enoch, Noah, Abraham, Sarah, Isaac, Jacob] died in faith, not having received the things promised, but having seen them and greeted them from afar, and having acknowledged that they were strangers and exiles on the earth. For people who speak thus make it clear that they are seeking a homeland. … But as it is, they desire a better country, that is, a heavenly one. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for he has prepared for them a city.” (Hebrews 11:13-16)
I am waiting for a Home that is to come. I am living in expectancy of it – so then why am I so frustrated when life doesn’t seem to work out the way I was planning? (i.e. – going on bed rest the same day we moved into our new house) This is not the season to be totally settled and completely at “home.” Similarly to bed rest. If I thought this was how my life would be indefinitely, each day would be much harder (and I do have great compassion for those who are bedridden without an end in sight – my heart goes out to you!). But I know that eventually, these babies will be delivered and I will be “delivered” from bed rest. I am not completely settled with my life right now that mainly consists of sleeping, reading, blogging and emailing, eating, hosting visitors, with frequent bathroom breaks. I want to be out of this recliner and active. Especially on such a beautiful beach-worthy Saturday as today. Yet I digress …
The point is that viewing this particular season as temporary and without knowing when it will end (but being assured that it WILL) gives meaning and purpose and urgency to each day. How much more so if I viewed all of my life as that – temporary, with a definite end yet unknown to me, and true Home ahead of me? How much more purposefully would I live? I hope to keep this lesson from this season of expectancy with me all of my life … thus preparing me better for the Life that is to come.
Tiny toes and feet. As you kick me, it’s a reminder of the secret weaving together your Creator is engaged in – of you, inside me. What a mysterious miracle! The kicks are as if you are seeking to let me know you’re here. I feel you. I await the moment when I will behold you as your Maker now sees you. The invisible made visible. The imagined becoming reality.
Times two – twice as amazing. It is hard to believe you will have an instant sister from birth and that our family’s size will instantaneously double. It is overwhelming at moments to try to picture what this will mean for us who have for almost four years just been two. What will it be like for us to now be four? How will our lives change? I can’t possibly begin to fathom it. But I cling to the promise of grace that is always equal to the moment and the day. So we will have twice the grace, and we already do.
I am resting now so that you can rest in the place safest for you. I am resting so you can be active. Once you are born, I will be active so that you can rest. You feel at home now, and you cannot imagine a home outside of me. Good! Stay that way for awhile longer yet. But there will come a day when you will be delivered into a larger home that you cannot imagine yet. You will be brought to our home, to a nursery lovingly prepared for you. It will feel strange. It will not feel like home at first. Yet our prayer is that you will find a home in our love, which will ultimately lead you to the One whose love is the best Home in which you can dwell. Enjoy your temporary, mysterious-to-me-yet-within-me dwelling for now. Kick away … and I will await your arrival with an expectant yet patient joy.
Posting today as part of Emily Wierenga’s Imperfect Prose on Thursdays. In Emily’s words, “This is going to be a place where we dig word-deep. where we uncover language lure, and breathe poetry. prose. in the name of faith. . . . Each week, let’s meet and find redemption in the grace of the other. let’s be broken on canvas, on material, on paper, on screen, together . . . for God is there.” Read more Imperfect Prose on Emily’s blog, in the hush of the moon. My friend Julie inspired me to join this.
An odd title for a post, isn’t it? Especially coming from someone who has admittedly never been really fond of mathematics or anything else number-related. Yet I am finding that these days of bed rest, I am paying much closer attention to numbers than before.
For every ONE day further that the babies stay put, that is saving them about SEVEN days in the hospital. So I take each day as a gift, which it always has been, but I am much more aware of that than before.
Yesterday marked ONE MONTH on bed rest. It really has flown by! Restlessness is starting to set in a bit, but I try to focus on just ONE MOMENT at a time. And there’s always grace given for that, whether it comes through a friend’s timely phone call or visit or through prayer, God’s Word, or a cherished line from a book I’m enjoying.
Today “baby A – a.k.a. Anna baby (her nickname)” measured THREE pounds, “baby B – a.k.a. Banana baby (her nickname)” weighed THREE pounds, TWO ounces. Keep growing, girls!!
I have gained THIRTY-SEVEN pounds during pregnancy, which is really good for twins since the mother’s rate of growth is thought to be crucial to the babies’ continued growth. And, yep, I just admitted that. Walking in the light of the truth from my previous post …
And I am now TWENTY-NINE weeks and TWO days along in pregnancy.
Praying for at least FIVE more weeks of growth for these TWO daughters of ours, so that they’re not born until THIRTY-FOUR weeks along.
EIGHT books I’ve completed during this past month of bed rest! And SEVEN blog posts … 
I found this picture on a miscellaneous website. I am not one for the bare belly shots myself, but I know each pregnant woman has a different opinion about that. It seems that for some, pregnancy is a time to embrace all the new curves and to feel proud that it shows you’re carrying a life. I suspect that for many others of us, pregnancy is a time when there is more unwanted attention to our bodies than we’re used to or would desire. And it feels like our bodies are really out of our control as well. Although the weight gain is purposeful (and needed!), it’s still hard to feel yourself getting larger by the week – and dramatically so by each month. Double all of that if you’re having twins.
What I find interesting about being pregnant is that the typical “taboos” that apply about commenting on a woman’s body weight seem to fly out the window, particularly for random strangers and (sorry to apply a stereotype) men in general. A few of the comments I’ve heard during pregnancy are:
“Wow … you’re just so … BIG!”
“You’re going to be ENORMOUS by the time these babies come.”
“Well, you’ve really gotten bigger since I last saw you.”
And I could go on, but you get the picture. No woman, even if pregnant, wants to hear someone connect the word “big” or any of its synonyms with her body. As someone who has always been on the thinner side of things (I can take no credit – all genetics – thanks, Mom!), it came as shock to hear these comments and then to notice the way I responded to these comments inside. I would get angry, frustrated, and feel resentful.
I realized that my identity was more wrapped up in my body image than I had previously thought. It was exposed by pregnancy. And as I processed through my thoughts and feelings in response to others’ comments, I realized I was giving them more power than I should. I noticed that my self-concept would rise and fall depending on whether I encountered the store clerk who said, “No way! You don’t look big enough to be carrying twins!” or the one who said, “You look much bigger than 15 weeks along!” Why were their comments so powerful? Because I was defining myself by my body image. I was internalizing the belief that my worth was equal to whether or not someone else perceived me as “big.” This is certainly quite different from where my true identity lies as a woman created in God’s image and redeemed by Christ (I taught on that in January through our Ephesians study, ironically enough).
When I began to meditate on who I really am – what is most true about me – others’ comments began to have much less effect on me. This also freed me from the inward judging and resentment I felt towards others because of what they said. I could laugh it off and let the comments “bounce off me” instead of letting them set the tone for my day.
Now I won’t say that it wasn’t still a struggle to go to Virginia Beach during the height of tourist season as the only pregnant woman for miles … but at least I began struggling against the lies instead of simply accepting them. And, hey, one benefit of bed rest is that there is much less opportunity for strangers’ comments about my ever-expanding belly!
One of the hardest parts of strict bed rest has to be Sunday mornings, when I can’t go to church but my husband (our assistant pastor) spends half of his day there (8:00 am – 12:30 or 1:00 pm). I don’t think I can remember a time when I couldn’t go to church for such a long stint of time. Yet I am thankful that our God is one who comes to us, so that we can worship him wherever we are and that I don’t miss out on his grace simply because I can’t attend church right now. I miss church – don’t get me wrong – and it is a source of rich grace to be able to go, but God knows (and has arranged) the particular seasons of my life. And so he will also arrange another way for me to experience church on Sundays. So with this unique season comes unique opportunities. I get to be my own “worship director”, and so I try to make Sundays different from the rest of the days.
The church bells around the corner regularly call me to worship when their hymns begin at 9:00 am (lasting until 9:30 am). That’s a nice start to the morning. Then I choose a sermon to listen to online from one of my favorites: our pastor, Jack Howell; Joe Novenson at Lookout Mountain Pres.; Ruffin Alphin at Westminster Pres. Church here in Suffolk; Bob Willetts at Grace Pres. Church here in Chesapeake; or Andy Lewis from the church I grew up in, Mitchell Road Pres. Church in Greenville, SC. It’s been great to listen to these sermons and be taught by God speaking through them. It’s been great to see how God’s led me exactly to the right sermon I’ve needed each week. And really there are too many good ones to choose from, so I’ll probably be adding another one as my “Sunday school.”
I listen to some favorite worship music and sing along [but this part I think I miss the most about not being able to physically be present for worship at Trinity Pres.], trying to focus on the words and make them my prayer.
Another way I am seeking to tangibly engage in worship on Sundays is by spending time reflecting on what I am thankful for and then communicating that to various people who have loved and served us in the past week. Truly the list seems too large to recount, and when I begin reflecting, I am aware of God’s gifts in the church and the way that he is sending the Church to me when I can’t go to church. Seth and I have been so overwhelmed by the many who have helped us. I won’t list them by name, but I do want to list a few of the acts of service I’m thankful for today:
- the friends who traveled from Philadelphia to spend last weekend with me and totally pampered me all weekend through their cooking, cleaning, creativity, laughter, and conversation
- friends from church who have brought us meals, visited me for lunch, ran errands for us, went grocery shopping for us, helped Seth paint our home (a seemingly never-ending project), and even cleaned our house … wow. we are overwhelmed!
- friends and family who continue to call or text to check in with me and see how we’re doing
- thoughtful and encouraging cards we’ve received in the mail
- two friends who threw their baby shower for me at our house – bringing everything with them, including serving dishes and utensils [since finding ours amidst the boxes could still be a bit dubious]
- my parents who have made the 14 hour roundtrip yet again to come and help us get settled in, paint the nursery, etc …
- and it goes without saying (but I should still say it!), my faithful and persevering husband who is not only assistant pastor, but also now home-repair project manager (a solo position now), chief chef, and home healthcare aide to a needy pregnant woman who can sometimes be cranky as well …
For all of these, and many many more, these verses Paul wrote to the Thessalonians come to mind: “We give thanks to God always for all of you, constantly mentioning you in our prayers, remembering before our God and Father your work of faith and labor of love and steadfastness of hope in our Lord Jesus Christ.” (1 Thessalonians 1:2-3)
